Sunday, August 26, 2012

NEW SH*T

Fuckin'.... jokes:




- There's a restaurant in my hometown that I love called “Thai Awesome.” The name's a little redundant if you ask me, though.




- That “Thai Awesome,” restaurant's really dear to me. My family has visited it quite a bit. I reserve the word “Precious,” solely to talk about this restaurant. In fact, when I have to mention the movie “Precious,” I just say “2009-teenaged-obese-illiterate-lady-movie.” People will figure it out sooner than later, I find.




- As a male 19 year old getting caught listening to Ke$ha is more embarrassing than getting caught masturbating by a nun who's also your mother who also blogs about everything you do.




A character/riff:




- One time I took a violin and cracked it again-st a stranger's head causing traumatic brain damage and putting him in a ceaseless coma...




… I mean, talk about being viol-lent. Ya know? Like violin...viol-lent? I'm as viol-lent as they come. They call me viol-lent Vinny.




...I apologize for how dumb that riff is.

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