Jokes:
- The friendly
yoga instructor is my favorite sex move.
- Sometimes I feel misunderstood. Like
when I'm wearing the shirt my brother got for graduation. It says 08
on the back and, ya know, people assume that's my actual
graduation date. But I'm class of 11. Fuckin' people,
right?
A medium-impressive joke, there haha. Next.
- “Two can play at that game!” -
Someone replying to a request to play chess.
- Woody Harrelson is the one guy who likes grass more than cows.
Also, medium-impressive. Also, next.
Thoughts that I'm interested in right
now. These quotes are not near exact but they're not too off either.
To be crystal clear, it's not comedy.
- “[I'd rather be too naïve than too
cynical.]” - Shane Mauss on the Pete Holmes podcast.
Just saying I like that thought.
- “[Perspective is a thing you can
only have for a brief time. Your friend gets sick and everyone comes
together and realizes how tough the situation is and how grateful we
should all be. Then the next day you're in your office and you're in
a huff and you're checking for things and you're growling 'Where's my
Snickers bar?!]” - Conan O'Brien on Marc Maron's podcast.
Just saying Conan takes this tough
thought to take and makes it funny. Awesome.
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