Tuesday, September 11, 2012

NEW SH*T

Jokes:


- The friendly yoga instructor is my favorite sex move.


- Sometimes I feel misunderstood. Like when I'm wearing the shirt my brother got for graduation. It says 08 on the back and, ya know, people assume that's my actual graduation date. But I'm class of 11. Fuckin' people, right?


A medium-impressive joke, there haha. Next.


- “Two can play at that game!” - Someone replying to a request to play chess.


- Woody Harrelson is the one guy who likes grass more than cows.


Also, medium-impressive. Also, next.



Thoughts that I'm interested in right now. These quotes are not near exact but they're not too off either. To be crystal clear, it's not comedy.


- “[I'd rather be too naïve than too cynical.]” - Shane Mauss on the Pete Holmes podcast.


Just saying I like that thought.


- “[Perspective is a thing you can only have for a brief time. Your friend gets sick and everyone comes together and realizes how tough the situation is and how grateful we should all be. Then the next day you're in your office and you're in a huff and you're checking for things and you're growling 'Where's my Snickers bar?!]” - Conan O'Brien on Marc Maron's podcast.


Just saying Conan takes this tough thought to take and makes it funny. Awesome.


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