Here are a few thoughts.
Humorous ones:
- I sure love wearing sandals. Am I a
douchebag or just a casual male? It's a very divisive subject; a
conundrum the greatest minds cannot untangle.
- I was on the phone with Staples
trying to get a rebate on an ink cartridge I bought and they
connected me to a bunch of different people within a minute. I'm the
customer, trying to get my rebate money; they should care
about me and how convenient their service is. I mean, fuck. I start
to feel like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas. Like "Oh, the place
burned down? Fuck you, pay me. Lightning struck? Fuck you, pay me.
Slow business? Fuck you, pay me."
Not humorous ones. Intense, serious
stuff:
- Only a fool villifies another man.
- My father used to be an impressionist
and a great one. I have this theory, by the way, that to mimic
something well you have to love it. It seems to be the impressionists
that love the character they're doing (i.e. Norm MacDonald as David
Letterman) do impressions the best. It goes to show, then, why my Dad
used to do such a great impression of Yoda and Darth Vader and way
more. They were my favorite.
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